Simply Authentic...your soul voice is calling. The Heart of Social Media

The Heart of Social Media

I have friends who post on Facebook (hereinafter referred to as FB) every single day, several times a day. I have friends who are irritated that other friends are encouraging them to get involved in social media, when they have absolutely no desire or time to do so. 

Me? I post photos on FB about once a week and keep tabs via notifications. I try and go in at least two or three times a week to post likes and happy birthday greetings. I post a link to this blog every week on FB, usually on Sunday later in the day. FB is where I went when I was creating a group forum for my 30^th high school reunion last summer, and it’s very convenient when you want to message a few people at the same time to plan a get-together. I’ve never played a FB game. I like to chat from time to time.

I like it, in other words. I think I have a healthy relationship with social media. My obsessive/compulsive leanings lie in other directions. Like…oh, never mind…I’ll talk about my quitting smoking again and need to pick up stuff that has been tracked in on the stairs in another post. That is if it is quiet enough for me to write about it, because I’m very sensitive to sound...in fact, I can hear my cat scratching in the litter box right now, which means I’d better go scoop out the cat poop and sweep up all the litter Lady kicked all over…

I’m sure you are nothing like this. (As Anne Lamott would say, when I refrain from picking stuff up off the stairs long enough to remember to credit her.)

Some of us like social media more than others, and we all have our “stuff.” I read something Martha Beck wrote in O Magazine not long ago (can you tell I read O Magazine virtually cover to cover every month? Seriously, I’m not addicted!) that talked about the myth of social media – how everyone seems to be so much happier in posts on social media than they really are. How seeing someone else’s happiness on places like FB can lead to a form of jealousy and feeling “less than.”

Know, when you see the photos and read the posts, about a friend going to somewhere like, say, Aruba, that they are in exactly the same boat (so to speak) as you are. When someone sends you a personal message, like a friend recently did to me, saying something like “I really like your new profile picture, but the color is all wrong – you look so grey” that the color is all wrong only if YOU think it is.

I don’t see social media going away, and it can be an authentic expression of your heart as if you were speaking / meeting with the person in person (like me with my friend who thought my hair looked grey, whereas I was perfectly happy with it.) If someone writes something that brings about an emotional reaction…you have the opportunity to breathe first, get your bearings, and determine how to respond. When you think about it, this is a bonus, having time to prepare how to respond (rather than react face to face) in the great virtual hub of humanity.  Or you can always just say LOL.

Authentically Yours, Laura

Simply Authentic...your soul voice is calling. Earning a Loving

Earning a Loving

I just got home from the theater after seeing Star Trek Into Darkness. This was a great movie, action-packed for sure!

I’m by no means a Trekkie, or Trekker, or whatever the term is, but I did enjoy Gene Roddenberry’s original series on television as a kid, and many of the TV shows and films as an adult. I love how the current cast, plot and direction pay respectful, and humorous, homage to the original TV series, and how Leonard Nimoy was once again in this film, playing an older version of Spock.

 

The classic dynamic between Spock’s logic and Kirk’s impetuous gut feelings remains wonderfully intact. Thank God.

 

It occurs to me that we (humans, without a drop of green vulcan blood running through our veins) each may battle at times between our “logical” mind and our “illogical” heart. I know I do! I have learned to pay close attention to my emotions, but there are times I look at my emotions and just go “What the f…? Where is this coming from? And why the h… did I have to experience this just right now? It’s so…inconvenient!”

Which, for some reason, brings me right back to something Michael Brown wrote in THE PRESENCE PROCESS: A Journey Into Present Moment Awareness, a book I mentioned in a previous post:

The idea that our purpose in being alive is found in something we are supposed to be doing is a misunderstanding that originates in childhood. It’s a misunderstanding passed on as part of the ancient belief systems that are energetically imprinted in us from the generations before us…

Our parents ask, “What are you going to be when you grow up?” This question denies the validity of everything we are already. Consequently, we behave as if manufacturing a life that supplies the correct answer to this question will bring us the unconditional love we didn’t receive as children.

This quest sets in motion the endless “doings” that become our adult life experience. We try to prove we are worthy of being alive by succeeding or by not succeeding. Even though we are already alive, we go in search of a purpose through which we may “earn a living.”

What we are attempting is to “earn a loving.”

Which brings me right back to a trailer about mountain men I saw before the Star Trek movie started.

What do I do for a living? I live for a living. –Paraphrased from trailer re: mountain men

Authentically Yours, Laura

Simply Authentic...your soul voice is calling. Alternate Futures

Alternate Futures

This is another post I pilfered from O Magazine (May, 2013 issue, page 148) because I loved this exercise too much not to share it!

Rachel Swaby engineered this article entitled, “Imagine The Possibilities”: Renowned adventurer Roz Savage helps you chart a course toward your future—whether you decide to go this way or that.

Thirteen years ago, Roz Savage thought she had everything she needed to live happily—a successful career as a management consultant, a husband, a home in London, and a little red sports car to boot. But in her day-to-day life, Savage routinely felt unfulfilled and much older than her 33 years.

So, one evening she sat down and came up with two alternate versions of her future: The first continued from the life she’d already built; the second was inspired by her long-buried desire for adventure. The exercises kicked off small moves—like a trip to South America—that led to bigger challenges. By 2005 Savage had left her job behind and set out to pilot a 23 –foot-long ocean rowboat across the ocean alone.

Today, at age 45, she’s also traversed the Pacific and Indian Oceans solo, and is feeling happier, more attractive, and more self-confident than ever—all thanks to her dual reality check. Even if you don’t think your future holds sweeping changes, Savage warns, taking the following steps “could have fairly dramatic consequences.”

1. ON A SHEET OF PAPER, MAP OUT YOUR FRIENDSHIPS, FAMILY, CAREER, AND LOVE LIFE FAR INTO THE FUTURE. This document should reflect the natural progression of your present circumstances. On another sheet, describe the person you aspire to be.

2. REFLECT ON YOUR ALTERNATE FUTURES. For Savage, imagining herself as an adventurer “felt like a truer version of my life.” She also discovered she was “rather bored” writing the realistic one.

3. DECLARE YOUR INTENTIONS TO DO SOMETHING GRAND. After Savage resolved to row solo across the Atlantic, she gave several newspaper interviews announcing her plans. “I just decided I was going to make it happen, and that was it,” she says. For the rest of us, a simple proclamation to friends and family should suffice.

-Rachel Swaby, O Magazine

If you decide to do this exercise, let me know what you discover, or uncover!

Authentically Yours, Laura

Simply Authentic...your soul voice is calling. Give in To the Rhythms of Your Life

Give in To the Rhythms of Your Life

I am not a poet, although at some point I might share with you some really bad poetry I attempted to write in the past.

I am a collager, however, and as I was sitting down this evening looking for some inspiration for this blog post, I found it right above me on a collage I did probably back in 2010.

What might my life be

like were I to give in

to the rhythms of my own

ragged dance? Like this,

I imagine, walking down

the trail, past grapevines

and winecups and huisache

blooming in the sun.

Just like this attentiveness,

this pleasure, this being

present to the world.

-Susan Hanson

There can be nothing more simply authentic than giving in to the rhythms of your own life.

Authentically Yours, Laura

Simply Authentic...your soul voice is calling. Just Take a Step: Part 3

Just Take a Step: Part 3

There is no such thing as failure. Take that word out of your vocabulary, right now! If you never try, you’ll never know.

This is the easiest of this three part series to write, because Dr. Wayne Dyer did it for me. The only difference between what Wayne wrote and I would write…well, I’d have used a broccoli soufflé or chocolate mousse reference instead of football!

The Myth of Failure

This may come as a surprise to you, but failure is an illusion. No one ever fails at anything. Everything you do produces a result. If you’re trying to learn how to catch a football and someone throws it to you and you drop it, you haven’t failed. You simply produced a result. The real question is what you do with the results that you produce. Do you leave, and moan about being a football failure, or do you say, ‘Throw it again,’ until ultimately you’re catching footballs? Failure is a judgment. It’s just an opinion. It comes from your fears, which can be eliminated by love. Love for yourself. Love for what you do. Love for others. Love for your planet. When you have love within you, fear cannot survive.

Think of the message in this ancient wisdom: Fear knocked at the door. Love answered and noone was there.

-Dr. Wayne Dyer, 10 SECRETS for SUCCESS and INNER PEACE

Authentically Yours, Laura

Simply Authentic...your soul voice is calling. Just Take a Step: Part 2

Just Take a Step: Part 2

Perhaps you want to make some changes in your life and you have a dream. Let’s say you’re worried about what people will think if you suddenly decide to…say…create the  next best cookbook based only on pork and apples, or create the perfect canned cat food holder, or go back to school to get your degree in nutritional therapy (your cats might need it with all that pork they have been eating…ha!)  You get the drift.

I quote here from my first book, SIX DEGREES TO YOUR DREAMS, Concept Five.

“Only share your dreams with people who will support and buoy you with encouragement…there is no place for negativity, drama, or nay-saying through this process. We tend to create enough of this in our own mind without help from others.

As you move into your new reality with the dreams you’ve been nurturing and nourishing, people you’ve known for years may not recognize the YOU NOW.

When people want to protect you from hurt and failure, they are usually afraid to take risks and step out into the six degrees to create their own dreams. Your pursuing your dreams brings up their regrets and doubts. Their inner wounded child is talking, and their negativity isn’t about you at all. You can be an inspiration for them. The key is to listen to the feelings being conveyed behind the words. Usually the feelings include some form of fear.”

All you really need to do is listen, openly and compassionately, if this happens. A hug might be in order, a thank you. Whatever you feel drawn to do. You don’t need to react, respond, or justify your dream.

Just keep taking one step at a time.

You know your path in your heart, and that’s all you need to know right now. The rest will come as you listen to your inner guidance.

I listen to my heart, body and inner voice above all else. –Laura Handke

When it comes to living a six-sensory life, you have to make a choice. To trust your vibes, you must stop allowing other people’s opinions and fears to override them or cause you to doubt or ignore what you feel. Trusting your vibes is an extremely self-empowering decision. It frees you from seeking approval and invites you to experience the peace of self-approval and acceptance… Yes, trusting your vibes is scary because when doing so you take full responsibility for your life. Yet, isn’t it far scarier to allow someone else to run your life? So muster your courage and take charge. Your vibes are trustworthy and are there to help you. Ignore those who interfere, and decide when it comes to your life, you’re the boss. –Sonia Choquette

Authentically Yours, Laura

Simply Authentic...your soul voice is calling. Just Take a Step: Part 1

Just Take a Step: Part 1

In my work with Wishweavers, and on a regular basis in general, I hear from people who want to make changes in their life, but have no idea where or how to start.

I heard Neale Donald Walsh (author of the wildly successful CONVERSATIONS WITH GOD series) speak - along with several other well known writers and teachers - in Wilsonville, OR, a few years ago. The topic was the same as what I am writing about here. I remember Neale saying (paraphrased), “If you don’t know what direction to go in, just take a step. Any step. If it doesn’t feel good, then turn a different direction and take another step.”

Obviously, that stuck with me.

I hope it does with you, too.

Your authentic self wants to be expressed. You came to this planet for a reason. Squelching your true desires out of fear only makes you and the people around you unhappy, perhaps as miserable as a mouse hiding under the washing machine to escape the cat. And the cat from not getting the mouse, keeping the paw going underneath, over and over and over.

Fear, you might ask? Fear of what? I’ll give you three guesses and the first two don’t count! J Well, actually, they do – because there is more than one fear. You can likely list far more than the three I will here.

1. Money. Security.

2. What will other people think?

3. What if I fail?

Our culture is based in huge part on the exchange of money for goods and services. And then there is health insurance. There is no denying how important this kind of security is for our comfort level and even survival in some cases.

But you don’t have to quit your day job to pursue your heart’s longing. All you have to do is take one step.

*Let’s say you like your current business and simply want to expand your client base. 

Here is just one suggestion: You could start collecting e-mail addresses and create an e-zine or blog that will grab your readers’ attention, wherein you offer periodic discounts – maybe two for one offers – that will bring more people to your practice or business.

Obviously, you are only going to do this if you are good at what you do, want to continue doing it, and know once people have a free sample they will keep coming back for more and/or invite their friends. (If you don’t know this, you should definitely move to the next asterisk!)

My first chiropractor used to write a monthly newsletter called “Dr. Steve’s Spinal Column” that was so funny I would read it from cover to cover every month. If you’re not a good writer, you could collaborate with someone who is, perhaps exchange services on a barter basis to start. Again, this is just one suggestion.

The first step is simply to start collecting e-mail addresses. That’s it. You don’t think about anything beyond that at this point.

*Let’s say you hate your job or business right now and have absolutely no idea what else you might like to do.

Here is just one suggestion: You could start by asking friends and colleagues if they know a good career counselor. If anything comes up, you could book an appointment – just one appointment, mind you – with that career counselor and see what happens. You could also start reading Barbara Sher’s WISHCRAFT or I COULD DO ANYTHING IF ONLY I KNEW WHAT IT WAS and make a lot of notes. That is actually two suggestions. (Personally, I preferred WISHCRAFT.) Just start with one step. Don’t think about anything beyond that at this point.

*Let’s say your back is sore from sleeping on a crappy mattress, and you know you need a new one, but can’t afford it.

Here is just one suggestion: Go to reputable mattress stores (I got my TempurPedic at Sleep Country) and try them out. Make sure they will give you 90 days to make up your mind, to see if the mattress works for you. You can also (another suggestion) do what a friend of mine did – ask a friend who had the same mattress if she could sleep on it for a night or two.

Many of these stores have a year to three year payment program with no interest, as long as you pay it off before the due date. Whatever you do, don’t go into debt for a new mattress; what you can do is set aside the money each month and pay off the mattress before the interest kicks in. In this case, it might be a good investment. 

Perhaps your first step could be simply to send one e-mail to several trusted friends whom you happen to know sleep well at night, and ask them about their mattress. Just one step.

Next up, next week: Dealing with what other people might think. (Ahem, who cares?)

Just take a step. One step. Any step. –Laura Handke

One of the most hopeful messages I received from successful women is that we need not fully believe something is possible, much less have a full-blown plan firmly in place. We just have to decide what we want and be willing to do whatever comes next. –Barbara Stanny

Authentically Yours, Laura